Meeting people can be a real challenge, especially in our fast-paced society. Looking for Mr. (or Mrs.) Right instead of Mr. Right Now can be extremely challenging. Before you become overwhelmed with frustration and decide to commit to a nunnery, try a few simple ideas first.
Get out of the house and look for events and activities that interest you. Ladies, do not look for a date at a drag strip unless you actually like NASCAR. Men, do not look for a date in a cooking class unless you fully intend on using some of those skills that you will be learning. Seek out places that match your interests – trying to change yourself can really backfire.
Many communities have health clubs for fitness fanatics or book clubs for avid readers. Find your niche. Local colleges and universities will often offer extended learning courses or free seminars. If you find one that interests you, don’t be afraid to go alone. It’s like a two-for-one –you may learn something and meet someone new!
As cliché as it may sound, try meeting people in church. Even if there does not appear to be any singles, little church-going older women are always looking for that special someone for their grandsons, nieces, etc. Never underestimate “word-of-mouth.” Who hasn’t been set up with a single friend of so and so? Maybe blind dates simply aren’t your thing- but at least you will be putting yourself out there!
Another great way to meet people is to place personal ads. These can be placed online or in newspapers. However, be careful. If you feel like you need to throw up a red flag, do so. That’s one of the joys of not knowing who you are meeting- they aren’t sure who may be standing them up.
Numerous websites feature chat rooms, personal ads, and individual photos of other members to help you find a date. Explore and browse but be careful. The computer may help you meet people but it can also provide a faceless chatroom conversation. It may be better to get outside your home, meet people, and have fun.
Notice that bars and nightclubs have not been mentioned. If you pick up a woman (or man) in a bar, what you see is entirely what you will end up with. Remember, they may not be there to find Mr. Right. That attractive girl at the end of the bar may only be looking for Mr. Right Now.
Be open to new possibilities but don’t pretend to be something that you are not. Enjoy who you are and maybe someone else will to.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
http://www.online4love.com/ is the primary way my husband and I meet likeminded "friends with benefits." There's no uncomfortable wondering if you ought to approach someone, you already know upfront when you meet them, and it is definitely worth the extra cost of becoming silver/gold imo, so you can exchange notes or pics before meeting and make sure its a good fit.
My hubby is str8 and I am bi and we have had no problem finding partners on online4love.com. We've had fun sex with lots of single men, single women and full swap couples that we met on O4L. And yes, I'm real, and no, I don't work for O4L or think they're perfect (they can be pricey and they goober up email sometimes,) but I think they're the best thing going by far for meeting other people who just want to have sex without strings!
For those complaining about the cost—ok, I agree, but I think you get what you pay for. I pretty much don't write people unless I can see what they look like and all, not because I'm shallow or a snob but because I want to know THEY'RE for real too and don't trust blank profiles...can you blame me? Also, it can be risky to contact people to swing with! Are they my boss? My brother? Twice my age? You get my drift. I’d like to know who I’m initiating a conversation with! The extra cost put into a good profile helps narrow down those you want to meet. How long do you pause on a profile that does not show a picture? (Faces can always be “smudged” until you know each other better to avoid embarrassing compromises.) And, although we are admittedly "just after recreational sex", part of having fun is that we have to LIKE our bedpartners too, so we look for things like a sense of humor and easygoing fun nature and a “click”. (And more expensive memberships include more matching criteria and stuff, too to help the odds of getting that “click” without too much searching.) So I guess I'm saying that if you don't cough up the extra cash for a full membership, don't expect overwhelming responses. There are lots of people who post their pictures and info, so when looking for people it's easy to breeze by the ones that don't. We may miss out on meeting some great people because of it...but we meet lots of great people too.
I agree there’s a high ratio of men to women, but I don’t know why that surprises anyone. Seems expected to me—although many women love sex, there do seem to be a lot more guys that are ok with swinging or casual sex than girls, for whatever reasons, and that’s not specific to O4L.
I definitely vote that it is worth the time and the money! We've had many a fun night of frolic thanks to connections we made on O4L. :)
Post a Comment